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Shirley "Joan" Stiteler-Tompkins, formerly of Altoona, passed away peacefully at The Summit of Plantsville, Southington, Conn., July 6, 2023. Shirley, also known as "Joan" (pronounced Jo-Anne), was born in Johnstown, although she lived all her early years in Altoona. She was a daughter of the late John Chester Stiteler Sr. and Hazel May (Calderwood) Stiteler, both of Altoona.
Shirley's brother, John Chester Stiteler Jr. "Johnny," was born to the couple in 1933. Shirley and Johnny also had an older half-brother, James Wendell Thompson, who was born on Dec. 17, 1921, to their mother, Hazel, and Hazel's first husband, Roy Holmes Thompson, during Hazel's early life in the Calderwood family of Tyrone. The untimely death of Roy Holmes Thompson on March 7, 1922, at the age of 37 due to acute appendicitis resulted in Hazel's eventual second marriage to John Chester Stiteler Sr.
At the age of 41, and having married Joseph De Barrueta, of Enfield, Conn., Shirley moved permanently from Altoona to Connecticut, where she found employment with the Aetna Insurance Co. of Hartford, Conn. Shirley then worked in an Aetna insurance office until her retirement on Feb.28, 1986. Shirley received a pension from Aetna for the remainder of her life. However, Shirley's marriage to Joseph De Barrueta ended in divorce on July 11, 1978.
Shirley married Charles M. "Charlie" Tompkins, who was a deacon at Plainville Seventh-day Adventist Church in Plainville, Conn., on Nov. 22, 1980. During Shirley's marriage to Charlie, and following Shirley's retirement from Aetna in 1986, Shirley worked to complete a four-year degree in Environmental Geography at the University of Connecticut, and received her BA degree on May 22, 1997, when she was 68 years old. Shirley and Charlie made several vacation trips out of the country, especially to England and Europe during their married years. However, Shirley's marriage to Charlie ended in divorce on Sept. 16, 2004. Charlie died in Plainville on June 12, 2006, was cremated and interred in the West Cemetery with his first wife, Ruth.
Shirley moved into a one-bedroom apartment in the Southington Housing Authority in 2008, where she quickly made friends, including her best friend in Connecticut, Gail Castiola. Gail is and was part of the SHA Residents Assistance team, and Gail and Shirley hit it off from its start in 2008 and throughout all the twists and turns thereafter, up to the point of Shirley's passing. Gail described Shirley's life as "long and adventuresome, happy, sad, tumultuous and adventurous - she was quite the spirited girl."
Shirley continued vacation trips abroad, which included solo overseas trips to Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, in 2012, and the last to Sydney, Australia, in September 2013 at the age of 85.
Shirley was successfully treated for breast cancer. Shirley later was diagnosed with macular degeneration in 2013. By 2021, it had become nearly impossible for Shirley to continue living alone in her apartment at the SHA. With Gail's considerable help, Shirley entered The Summit of Plantsville on June 18, 2021, at the age of 92. Shirley entered long-term care at The Summit through the financial assistance of the State of Connecticut-Department of Social Services. For quite some time, Shirley was very active at The Summit, and as has always been her nature, she was able to seduce many of the other residents and staff to come to love her personality. However, age, and one of the plagues of modern America, "dementia," finally got the better of her. A final fall in April 2023 resulted in a broken femur and put Shirley onto her final decline. Her passing occurred after entering Hospice Care at The Summit.
Shirley never had any children. She is survived by her brother, John Chester Stiteler Jr. "Johnny" and his wife, Dorothy "Dot" Elizabeth Stiteler, of Hollidaysburg. Shirley is also survived by the children of Johnny and Dot (in age-descending order): John Milton Stiteler and his wife, Deborah Jane "Janie" (Weathersbee) Stiteler, of Springfield, Va.; Mark Allen Stiteler of Columbia, S.C.; Susan Elaine (Stiteler) Clark and her husband, Kevin Clark, near Harrisonburg, Va.; Robin Kim (Stiteler) Jones and her partner, Bill Passmore, of Altoona; Gregg Alan Stiteler and his wife, Kathy (Mangicarne) Stiteler, of Hollidaysburg/Altoona; as well as the children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren of John Milton, Susan, Robin and Gregg. There are no surviving relatives from James Wendell Thompson's family.
Shirley's body was cremated on July 8, 2023. Her cremains will be interred at the West Cemetery gravesite with her mother, Hazel May (Calderwood) Stiteler, and next to her former husband, Charles "Charlie" M. Tompkins. A graveside ceremony will be performed by Donald Tompkins, an Elder in the Plainville Seventh-day Adventist Church, 97 Broad St., Plainville, CT 06062-2246. The date and time have yet to be determined.
Contact the Plantsville Funeral Home, 975 S. Main St., Plantsville, Conn., for further information.
In lieu of flowers, the family requests that memorial contributions be made to the American Cancer Society (www.cancer.org).
www.plantsvillefuneralhome.com