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On New Year's Eve 2003, when Martin Lockett was 24, he drank all day and into the evening, in keeping with a rampant alcoholism that had afflicted him since the age of 16, and while drunk, crashed his car into another vehicle while trying to beat a red light, killing two people and seriously injuring a third.
The victims in the other car had been in long-term recovery, had devoted their lives to helping others get clean and sober and were returning just then from a "clean and sober" New Year's Eve party -- an ironic fact that led the author of a news article that focused on the victims, and that Lockett saw in prison three days later, to write in conclusion: "Perhaps the person they will have ended up helping the most is the man charged with killing them."
And so it has happened: inspired by the journalist's hopeful speculation and by the forgiveness that survivors of the victims expressed at his sentencing hearing for manslaughter, Lockett has devoted his life to helping prevent drunk driving, a resolution he solemnized with a vow at that sentencing hearing -- as explained Thursday by Lockett to a group of 20 individuals at a DUI awareness and impact program at Penn State Altoona, sponsored by the campus' Wellness Health Advisory Board.
Locket spent 17.5 years in prison for his crime, during which he consciously developed sustaining and sustainable healthy habits like jogging and reading; during which he worked on "peeling back" personality traits that had led to his alcoholism, got a high school equivalent degree, a bachelor's degree, then a master's, while also writing a blog and two books.
Since he got out 4.5 years ago, in addition to securing a day job as director for an organization in Portland, Oregon, that helps people with mental health and substance abuse issues and conducts suicide prevention efforts, he has traveled around the country to tell his story, participating in DUI victim impact panels, talking at high school safety assemblies and taking part in college conferences.
Having developed personal discipline in prison, but realizing his options there had been restricted, he was afraid that when he got out that he might have a problem "being in the free world sober," he said, in answer to a question after the talk from Ashley Bowmaster, prevention specialist for the Blair Drug and Alcohol Partnership.
Part of that was the fear that "life would be boring," he said.
It hasn't proven to be boring, but he needs to continue the discipline, using a strong "relapse prevention" strategy, he said.
That has meant establishing and maintaining "boundaries," while being aware of his own internal and external "triggers," he said.
He sometimes needs to quiet his "addictive brain" when it whispers things like it would be nice -- and harmless -- to have a glass of wine with dinner, he said.
He has never had a healthy relationship with alcohol -- and never will, he said.
He makes sure friends and family understand and respect those boundaries, he said.
He uses "facts and logic" and he plans relentlessly.
If he's going to a Super Bowl party, he'll leave before the game begins, before things get too intense.
When it all becomes too much -- if he sees he's getting irritable, or if it's been too many days since he worked out, he will take a walk, or a run, or read a book or go to an Addicts Anonymous meeting.
He accepts that there are going to be bad days.
Transportation is a perpetual issue, as by law, he can't drive until 2029, which means lots of Uber rides and reliance on public transportation or the charity of others who drive him around -- including the future sister-in-law who drove him to Altoona from Lebanon, he said.
Still, since he's been out, "I've been living my best life," he said. "The most beautiful thing is I wake up and remember it."
"This is who I'll be for the rest of my life," he told the group.
"My poor choices led to so much pain," he said, having emphasized repeatedly that he blames no one else for what happened -- a practice he enforces by never referring to the crash as "an accident."
"I'm 100 percent culpable," he said. "It all could have been avoided."
He's guilty, but his story helps show that "no one is beyond redemption," he said.
Mirror Staff Writer William Kibler is at 814-949-7038.