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My wife and I were running some errands recently and while walking through the store, she stopped suddenly at the greeting card section. Looking over the cards she said, more to herself than me, "Linda and Joe's birthday are coming up, I need a graduation card for Kara and I should keep one or two sympathy cards on hand as well."
Being a well trained husband, I know at times like this the best thing for me to do is be quiet and try to find the funny card section to read until this is over. My wife and I have a different opinion on what makes the best card for any occasion. She looks for the perfect card, while I tend to pick one that is or can be altered to be funny to fit the occasion.
One card immediately got my attention. It was a simple and direct card that said on the outside, "Happy 90th Birthday" and inside simply stated -- "Happy Birthday." Actually I was surprised to find it and noted that it was the only card like it on the rack.
Smiling, I offered it to my wife for her consideration. Glancing at it she asked, "Who is this for?" I responded, "It is for our neighbor -- Joe, his birthday is later this week."
"Did you look at this card," she asked. "It's nice, but it is too simple, only saying Happy Birthday not to mention it says 'Happy 90th Birthday.' Joe is only going to be 60. Do you think you might have missed something in your selection?"
"It might seem like that to the untrained eye, but there are several things you are missing," I responded. "First of all, Joe is not expecting a card at all so simply getting him one will be greatly appreciated. Second -- he would feel awkward asking me to return the tools I recently borrowed right after I gave him such a nice card. That will give me a little more time to finish the job I was working on and still get the tools back before he asks. So you see, it is a win-win situation."
"I think you forgot one small detail -- the card is for a 90-year-old," she replied. "How are you going to explain that?"
"Ah, that's the best part," I said with a laugh. "First of all, the short greeting inside. Any 90-year-old has better things to do with his time than read a bunch of mush in a card that he probably can barely see. The card is on sale for only a buck, probably because they do not sell many 90-year-old birthday cards. Joe is like me, he likes to save money so I am going to leave the price tag on. He will get a kick out of that and because he loves getting a good deal he will appreciate it even more. The best part is I plan to put a note inside that says because I am 85 years old now, I will be 110 years old on his 90th birthday and will not even be alive and consequently unable to attend the festivities. In essence, I am simply getting him a birthday card ahead of time, which is really thoughtful. I think I have all the bases covered."
Turning back toward the card rack and shaking her head she whispered, "Sometimes I just don't understand you, but I must admit, you never cease to amaze me -- check and see if you can find a card for that."
John Kasun writes from his home in Duncansville where he is always thinking. However his wife Sandy admittedly does not always understand what he is thinking.