It seemed like only a few weeks ago the government told American taxpayers that it was necessary to loan money to General Motors to keep it from going bankrupt, which would be devastating to the country.
Well, $15 billion later, it seems as if General Motors went bankrupt anyway and that large sucking sound you heard was your money going down the drain.
If you think that was bad enough, think again because now General Motors has become Government Motors. Yes, those politicians in the new suits who never have run a company, met a payroll or even paid for their own lunch are now in charge of a real business.
Based on their track record, I think we can get a pretty good idea of what the car of the future might look like.
Because Democrats and Republicans will want to have a hand in car design and because they never agree, I feel confident that the car will have different size tires, causing it to lean severely to one side.
The good news is everyone will be wearing their seat belt; the bad news is they will have to just to stay in the seat. To comply with government safety regulations, the car will have air bags, front, back, side, top and bottom. The problem is the air bags will be filled with hot air, the only thing actually produced in Washington.
Although people will be safe from injury in the event of a crash, they could suffer from severe burns from the hot air.
The exterior design of the car will resemble a Studebaker from the 1950s. For those too young to remember the Studebaker, it looked the same from the back or the front, so you couldn't really tell if it was coming or going. Because politicians love to talk - but never really say anything - the look will fit right in with the Washington way of doing things.
The car will have built-in GPS navigation. However, because of the present direction of our country toward socialism, the system only will allow the driver to make left turns. All right turns will be automatically be reported to the government's GPS czar.
To cut manufacturing costs, the heater has been eliminated. Al Gore said that in view of the increase of global warming, heaters will not be required in the future. Big Al, what a guy.
Another visionary move is the lack of a spare tire.
With increasing gas prices and the possibility of an additional gas tax, the government thinks most people will not be able to afford to drive, so the need for a spare tire will decrease sharply. However in the event anyone would have the money to buy gas and if they did get a flat, this situation has been covered.
As soon as the car's on-board computer detects a flat tire, the DVD player immediately displays a video of President Barack Obama giving his famous "Hope and Change" speech. It may not get the flat fixed, but the speech is so good that chances are the driver will forget about his flat and blame the problem on those greedy people on Wall Street.
I guess the good news is if the new Government Motors cars do not sell, the American taxpayer always will be there to bail the company out. That sucking sound you hear is more of your money going down the drain - or in this case the exhaust pipe.
