What are you waiting for?

Tales from the front pew

Summer is winding to its inevitable close — kids are headed back to school, autumn-themed merchandize is appearing on store shelves and there’s that little tell-tale nip in the early morning air signifying changing weather soon to come.

That being noted, it’s time for my annual “how I spent my summer vacation” column.

1. I didn’t actually go on any vacations.

Nope, no frolicking on the beach, no seaside sipping of exotic concoctions garnished with tiny umbrellas and no shaking sand out of oversized towels. (I did watch a bunch of those “Sandals” resort commercials, though, in case that counts.)

Finding frolicking not financially feasible, my husband Bob and I chose instead the trendy “stay-cation,” which everybody knows is code for “I’m too broke, tired and or/lazy to leave the house, so I’m gonna stay home, paint my bathroom and pretend like it’s fun.”

2. I battled with my daughter over air conditioning.

Val is a stickler for creature comforts, especially regarding temperature. I don’t know if it’s a physiological issue or a psychological one (although I have a pretty good idea), but the minute our air shut off, she started complaining.

“Mom, did you turn the air conditioner off? It’s roasting in here.”

“It’s 70 degrees, Val. That does not constitute ‘roasting.'”

“It sure doesn’t feel like

70 degrees. Maybe there’s something wrong with the AC.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right, dear. As a matter of fact, I can actually feel my extremities, which means they’re thawing out. Maybe we should call a heating and cooling company.”

3. I binge-watched the Game Show Network, primarily episodes of Family Feud, from which I gleaned two important truths: One, Steve Harvey has the biggest, whitest teeth on TV, and two, intellect (and lack thereof) really is genetic.

4. I didn’t put hanging baskets of flowers on our front porch.

After a host of unsuccessful attempts, I finally came to terms with the fact that I’m the Grim Reaper of all green and growing things. I won’t lie, it was a painful realization, but knowing I spared countless innocent blossoms in the process made me feel better.

5. I finally beat my older sister, Debi, at Ruzzle.

A word puzzle game Debi introduced me to a few years ago, Ruzzle, is fast-paced and lots of fun to play on a smartphone.

While I do pretty well with most opponents, I habitually lost to my sister. Until this summer, that is. I knew I’d truly mastered the game when she texted me and said, “You keep winning. I don’t like that, and I’m not going to play with you anymore. Luv you, sis.” (Did I mention that Debi isn’t a good loser?)

Yep, another summer has come and gone with all of its realized and unrealized potential.

The Bible tells us that this life is just a vapor and will be over before we know it. Still, many of us live like we have all the time in the world, putting off the really important things, like a relationship with the Lord.

Time is a fleeting thing. What are you waiting for?

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